A little while ago I was given the opportunity and idea to write a fairy tale. The fairy tale was to be a little different in that it was to be about me, a thread or two of my life from beginning to now, and it was not to have an ending… Not yet! The process of reflection, writing and then sharing the story with a group of beautiful women was one of the most profound and powerful experiences I’ve had. It takes courage to share our creativity, more courage to be seen and heard speaking of ourselves, and yet more courage to read the truth of the story and see the deeper unfolding of our life to present day. I’m now taking another gulp of courage and choosing to share my story with a much wider audience, knowing that I am not granted the same level of protection from judgement or criticism as I had within the circle of women. I am choosing this in the hope that it may inspire others to go through the same writing process, and if you can, to read out your creation to a circle of loved friends. You will be amazed at what beauty and wisdom your story holds, and how deeply it impacts on those who hear it. Write forth with grace and courage…

The Story Of Amanda

Once upon a long time ago, there lived a little girl named Amanda, and although Amanda was not born in a castle or palace, her Mother and Father believed her to be their princess, a largely tatty, messy and boyish princess, but special to them all the same.

One sunny day Amanda went for a stroll in the woods, while out in the woods she came across a fallen tree covered in silky green moss. The bend in the trunk made a perfect place to perch a small bottom, so upon the trunk Amanda sat. As Amanda sat, eyes closed, sensing the gentle breeze on her skin, hearing birdsong and small scurrying animals and insects busying around in the ground, she found herself experiencing magic. Without words, the trees and flowers, animals and insects, seemed to somehow reach out to her, or she to them, and for a short while Amanda was a tree, was a bird flying above, she was a worm pushing its way through dank cool earth. Amanda was instantaneously connected to all living things, she was spirit flowing freely with life, she knew what God was and it was not what she had been told it was at church, at home or at school. The Earth itself held her gently and urged her to remember to come back to this place anytime life as a human felt too challenging to bear. Amanda heard a whisper on the wind, it was the echo of a time long ago, an ancient wisdom told in symbols. A sacred wisdom that had to be remembered in order to allow the future to flow. Rolling her eyes to the skies, Amanda sighed, “c’mon guys, I’m six years old, that’ll have to go on the back-burner for now!”

And up she jumped and skipped and tripped and clumsily danced her way home.

There were many times in Amanda’s young life that she found herself taking refuge in gardens and country lanes, in fields and next to streams in woodland. Life amongst the human’s was tricky, people told lies, their mouths spoke words that simply did not match what their energy was saying. The children she shared her days with at school played games of the not-so-fun kind, they were cruel, bullying, fighting with one another for power and attention. Amanda was not happy here, not comfortable in this awkward gangly body of hers. People were confusing to her, she felt an absolute love for all things, for everything found in nature, this included humans, but she could never feel the love being returned. So Amanda sat, as the Earth had previously urged her, and connected with something bigger, something ever flowing with the energy of love and this connection kept her strong and capable, in a small and fearful way.

Then one day, Amanda’s father surprised her by finally allowing her to do something she had been begging to do for as long as she could remember… He allowed her to go with him on a bike ride with a big cycling club. On this huge day of adventure, her little legs pushed her peddles for twenty miles over hills and into valleys. Amanda met with a group of teenagers, who, unlike the children of the unhappy school variety, accepted Amanda just as she was. They didn’t pick out her freckled face and gappy teeth as something ugly or weird, they didn’t comment on her spindly legs or puppy fat tummy. Instead they were interested to hear her thoughts, they found the jokes she told funny, they gave her jovial little hugs, and they told her they hoped she would be back next week. And she was, and the week after, and the week after that. Amanda grew with this group of companions throughout her teenage years and into her twenties, and in amongst this group Amanda found her first Prince Charming, and her second, and third, well, a few really (she was in her teens after all!)

One Prince Charming was a little more persistent than the others, to the point that on another day, a long time ago, Amanda married this Prince… But far from the happy ending as found in so many Fairy Tales, this was simply the beginning of another adventure into the complexities of human relationship. So long and complex was this adventure that it requires a little side-step, a different tangent, a story within a story, so here it is:

Once Upon a Golden Time there was a little girl, who dreamed her dreams of Kings and Queens and sparkling never-worlds....

I met you as a tender teen and swore I'd found my prince
I clung on tight through rough rebukes that turned my brain to mince
I wore your ring too readily tho t'was heavy with rejection
The icy looks of pure disdain took place of sweet affection
All those hopes and dreams and needs and lists of expectations
Were ripped and torn and unfulfilled, stamped out with condemnation
You too my Prince were led astray by the given label “wife”
I did not fit the category so burdened all your life
Until the day I spat you out, frustrated with suppression
The victim turned from whining cow deep seated in depression
To fearsome feline, like cornered cat I hissed and scratched and bit
I thought I'd share my battle scars and gave you wounds to lick
The ring was tossed into the night in furious bid for freedom
My heart did bleed as did my eyes with tears for all years stolen
The fairy-tales of Kings and Queens were bitter in my mouth
I ripped them out, with my tongue, and buried them along with my youth
Encased in brittle cast iron shell I found my independence
With self-sufficient warrior soul I kicked against dependence
I stood so strong, a tower of might cascading through the world
I took God's love in place of man's and entered a spiritual swirl
And in that swirl I opened up and tasted all the lessons
In awe I gazed into your soul and recognised your blessings
Through you and others who have since been I have learned of many things
Of what love is, of what love is not, of truth and how life sings
Of challenge, of joy, of peace, of hate, of Oneness with all souls
Of the illusion of expectations, and of the beauty as grace unfolds...

Once upon a Golden time there is a wiser Queen, who dreams life's dreams, who flows with love, who is now ready for her King.

And so to present day…. Amanda is now all grown up, well, nearly, and is hearing the whisper on the wind once more, a whisper of intangible truths given in etheric symbols. Now she rolls her eyes to her third eye and says to the world ‘ok guys, bring it on!’ Although Amanda can only sense a hint of what this may mean, she is willing to go there, wherever there may be, and be whatever she is, in order to bring forth the ancient past to support the flow into the future. The future that is yet to be written…

This is not the end!

One Billion Rising Flashmob – Februray 14th 2013

Piccadilly Gardens was yesterday host to a large group of women and men, holding a ‘flashmob’ to support the One Billion Rising campaign. The campaign aims to raise awareness of violence and discrimination against women all over the world. Through a combination of dance, song and protest it has united people globally to say enough is enough.  The protest lasted around two hours, and included a minutes silence for all past atrocities against women. It was put on by a number of organisations, which included the Pankhurst Centre. An evening event with music, poetry and theatre was also put on by the Zion Arts Centre in Hulme.

The reasons for this event are clear. One third of women (1 billion) are raped or beaten in their lifetime. Female genital mutilation is still practiced in some parts of the world. Many women have to put up with sexist behaviour on a regular basis in their work, social or family lives and often feel unable to speak out as they fear the consequences. Ignorant and sexist attitudes still exist in all societies.

As a man, I feel it’s particularly important to support such campaigns. I want to make the point this is a male issue too. If it’s viewed as just a women’s issue, then it won’t be solved. The whole point is that we’re all human, we’re all life and we’re all dependent on one another. A lot of men feel uncomfortable speaking out about women’s rights, or gay rights (but not so much racism!) I think there’s a perception it’s somehow emasculating. All these issues are about discrimination, and they’re all as important as each other.

What does protesting actually achieve? It’s a valid question I’ve heard a lot of people ask before. What protesting does is to raise awareness. It raises awareness which is harnessed in people’s everyday actions. Even if people don’t immediately accept what they see or hear; if it’s true it will stick with them. There’s no hiding from the truth. I think this point is missed by some as you can’t always see the effects straight away, but this is how it works.  Too many people in the UK are unaware of too much, but no one can be unaffected when they hear about some of the things that go on in this world. Protest and campaigning can fill the gap often left by the mainstream media.

We all have a masculine and feminine side, whatever category our bodies fall into. Denying either of those will cause suffering. I hope violence and discrimination against women will be ended as soon as possible, though I fear it could be a while. The most important thing is for people to educate themselves, speak out and take whatever action they can. This applies to any issue which is causing people to suffer. No one can do everything, but everyone can do something.

http://www.manchesterawakening.org.uk

This thing we call stress, which most of us have experienced at some point and I’m sure many of you experience on a daily basis, what is it? What does it mean when someone says they are suffering from stress and anxiety? Stress and anxiety are symptoms of something underlying which is causing an imbalance in our thinking.  This has an impact on us physically, mentally and emotionally.

 Let’s look at the emotional/ mental aspects first. We very often blame the external factors in life for the stress we are feeling, money, relationships , career. However, if we look inside and question what really lies at the heart of the issues we often find that there is a feeling of being out of control of our own lives. Managing stress is about taking control of how you deal with your life, being honest and realistic with yourself about the life you wish to create. I believe it is how you choose to think about a problem that is very often the cause of the problem.  It seems logical to think that it is the event happening to us that is causing stress, but the opposite is actually true. It is our response to the event which causes the stress. It is our assumption about reality and not reality that cause us to think in a way that is stressful. It is the thought ‘I can’t cope with this workload’ that is the stressor not the work load itself. So with this in mind, we can process what is going on in a more productive way.

· Be realistic about what you can and cannot achieve

· Be honest about your emotions let your feelings out, talk to someone.

· If you are struggling, get help. It is not a sign of weakness to admit that you cannot cope. It is a sign of strength to recognise that you need help.

· Ask honestly ‘Is it the situation/person that is causing me stress or is it reminding me of something/someone  from my past?’.

·  Realise that you can change your perspective on a problem. Ask ‘How can I change my thinking on the issue to be more positive/productive?’

· Focus daily on the bigger picture, give less importance to the small stuff and remind yourself that life can be ultimately about joy, the joy of your connections with others and with the activities and simple things in your life that bring you meaning and joy.

Physically, stress impacts on our bodily systems . The main impact is on the nervous system. The central nervous system has two parts, sympathetic and parasympathetic .  In ancient times when we roamed the plains we humans had to get away from dangerous wild beasties rapidly and so the sympathetic nervous system ,kicks in and gives the body what it needs to make its ‘flight’ from danger. Blood leaves the vital organs and moves into the limbs to enable a quick getaway and all unnecessary activity is ceased until the situation is safe again. This is marvellous for getting away from scary beasts but when the scary beast is your boss or the bills coming through the letterbox we cannot just run away. So stressful situations mean that the parasympathetic system is switched on constantly and adrenaline is pumping, when this is a daily norm the nerves get weakened and burnt out. The parasympathetic nerves do act to calm the stress response and bring us into a relaxed state. However, in order to do this we need to learn to relax. I am constantly amazed by the blank faces when I ask people what they do to relax. Watching television or going on Facebook may be part of your down time but the body really needs to rest deeply and in order to do this we need to come out of the mind and rest deeply in the body. Two great ways to relax are, Yoga Nidra ( a yogic sleep practice), Body scan ( a guided meditation) there are many websites and even MP3’s you can find and download. Less formally, just walking in nature or spending time doing hobbies you love can be very relaxing if you make the time for yourself.  It seems like madness to invest so much into getting the life we want but never stopping to enjoy it.  Giving so much to our external world but giving nothing back to ourselves, is futile.  The food we are consuming can also add to levels of stress, anything that is a stimulant will raise the stress response. This includes coffee, tea, salt,sugar and processed food. There is so much information available these days on the internet about healthy diets and stress relieving, soothing foods. If you are not sure what to do about your diet then educate yourself, it can be wonderfully empowering and give you a feeling of taking control.

Here’s some tips:

· Try the meditation included below, aim to do it at least 5 days out of 7.

· Learn how to relax, there are lots of resources on the internet.

· Try left nostril breathing to calm and relax you . Blocking off the right nostril with a finger and breathing long and deep through the left nostril you can change a stressful state of mind into a calm state within 3 mins… try it for yourself!

· Make time for relaxation every day and do not let anything encroach that. Be as dedicated to yourself as you are to your work/family/ friends.

· Cut down on those stimulating foods and eat more natural, wholesome healthy foods instead.

· Exercise regularly, this builds up strength in the nervous system so you can cope much better with stress. Kundalini yoga works on strengthening the nervous system.

· Make sure you get out into nature as often as possible. Nature is a marvellous help, not only for the sunlight and fresh air but also nature is a great teacher. We can watch a passing cloud and realise that all things do pass. We can delight in the seasons and also learn about death and rebirth. By letting go of what is past we can make way for something new to come into our life.

Try this meditation. Click here

Elaine 'Akal Dev'

Holistic Manchester was built out of the idea of community togetherness. Travelling the world I found there were many areas, particularly in the US that had a sense of belonging and encouragement. Their communities would meet, for no reason but to offer support for the great work they were doing. Based around the ultimate universal idea of love and acceptance, these events were social, creative, impassioned with music, dancing, singing and new friendship.

I returned back to the UK almost 5 years ago and found no such community. Everything was based upon Mind Body Spirit selling worthless trinkets and spiritual materialism. Real missing the point kind of stuff. So I started to build the idea of having a holistic social, for anyone working or just interested in the field of holistic wellbeing or medicine. This would of course in clued all the alternative and complementary therapies, yoga, meditation and any other conscious work. I wanted to provide a space of acceptance inside Manchester and demonstrate that there was a support community, where people could come together , eat and chat and with no agenda but to meet, eat and chat.

It worked excellently. Having been running for the last 3 years the events are excellent and enjoyed by all. No one is cast aside and everyone is encouraged. At the events we have speakers, often 5 or 6 and some speaking at the same time so you have to chose which to go to. The topics vary from life coaching to sound healing to meditation practice and kundalini yoga.

There is a 650 plus facebook group now www.facebook/groups/holisticmanchester and a web page at www.holisticmanchester.com  - For those people not on facebook I have recently created a Meetup page on http://www.meetup.com/HOLISTIC-MANCHESTER/

The group welcomes all and currently hosts events every 2 months with the next on the 17th of Feb in Hale – the following one is on the 14th of April in Hale.

The facebook page also doubles wonderfully as a community posting board and I welcome all posts that are holistic in some way – they must be promoting the togetherness of holistic understandings. The group is completely non religious and welcomes all faiths and belief systems so long as they are themselves accepting of others.

It’s a joy and an honour to be part of this group.

With love

Mark
www.markabadi.com
www.bookevolve.com